Just let me die

Too...much...work...for...one...human...being...to...handle. Does the "..." lose its meaning when you use it for every word in the sentence? I'm Not feeling the tops right now. Not quite feeling the bottoms either. Maybe you should go change. Maybe I need some change cuz I used it all to buy pop that one time. Did you ever think of that? Beware of perverts on the subway. So who's ready for a CHALLENGE!!!! 20x6!!!! Without TV I think I'd be a mad man. So if you were ever kickin' it with Byron Allen at 3:00 in the morning, wouldn't you want to punch him right in the face? Me neither. Byron is the coolest. I can't seem to find my motivation for this scene. Wait. There it is. It was underneath my huge guns. Oh yeah! Oh it's a deep burn. It's so deep! I'm waiting for the render to be over. Just so you know. Hey Darin. I've got three quick questions. What's the best thing you've ever seen, done, eaten? I bite my toenails with anticipation for your overwhelmingly awesometastic respooonce. That's right, I spelled response wrong big deal wanna fight about it?

My newest post EVER!

I had a dream. No, that's not all. I'm going to tell you the content of this dream. Aren't you glad? You shouldn't be glad. It's a haunting dream. But you get your choice of topping! Aren't you glad? You shouldn't be glad. I can't remember the entire dream and you will be left unfulfilled. But the dream was pretty good if you have any understanding of my most intimate life. If not, you're smart. In this so-called "dream," I was at my church. That's all! Not really. I was performing on stage in a band. Not just any band though, this band contained the members Reese Roper and Dennis Culp from the formerly world renown, (minus Antarctica and some parts of Zimbabwe) Canada loving, dog killing, foot walking, zombie killing band called Five Iron Frenzy. They were dressed in funny outfits. I think Dennis had on Elton John glasses. We rocked the house. I don't remember the songs we played, or who played what, or any other details of the playing or the rocking, but I do remember that it was the greatest rocking that the free world has ever seen (the slave world sees it all the time, those guys can rock. But you never hear about it cuz they're snobby and some got silenced in bad ways for the "bak talkin'."). After the show me and "the guys" (and when I say "the guys" I mean me, Reese, Dennis, George Lucas (who I call Jar Jar just to spite him), some bear with a funny hat on, and a random church choir) went backstage and talked for a little bit about how awesome I was and how hard I rocked. Actually, I don't really remember what we talked about. I'm assuming that was it because I'm sure I was and did, but all I can remember was that I was drinking out of this big plastic cup full of grape juice. I remember them commenting on that. I wish I remembered more but it's a miracle that I remembered this much. I think the dream means I'm supposed to get a pet. Maybe I'll get a bear with a funny hat...or a random church choir. Either way, I won't have enough money to feed it and it'll die within 72 hours. Told you you'd feel unfulfilled.

New hair! Do?

Recently, I got my hairs cut. Yes friends, I sold out. I got a fauxhawk (fake mohawk) or as you fumans would call a "corporate mohawk." Now I have been noticing that people don't like it. No one has straight out told me they don't like it (except my girlfriend, bless her little corn), but you know how people say, "Well, if I didn't like it, I just wouldn't say anything." Yeah. That. That's been happening. The majority of people that I know notice my drastically different hair have not mentioned anything about it. It's OK. I like it, and that's what's really fimportant. I'm SO not depressed about it or anything. Nope. Don't wanna cry uncontrollably right now. I can tell you that right out. Is anyone else crying uncontrollably right now? You know what would rise my self esteem? Watching Labyrinth again and pointing/laughing/screaming in terror at David Bowie's hair style would make all better the hurtings. Then I would have to suffer through "Dance Magic Dance, Jump Magic Jump" again (shudder with fear). I'm going to point my chair this way now.

Random family fact:
We have a bowl full of candy from Halloween...of 1992. I've given people candy from it and not felt bad at all. Fonderful.

This title is hillarious (laugh)

So I just figured out that I am going to be a senior here at UIC for two and a half years. Hooray for the American public education system! Hooray for floppy discs! So I'm at the Savvy Traveler yesternoon. I'm in China and there's this porcelain llama that's making the most 'tarded face I've ever seen on a porcelain llama. And every time I look up at him...he's looking directly at me. And that's the end. Nothing more happens. And by nothing, I mean we did NOT get any closer emotionally, or call each other every hour on the hour after that, or exchange our blood types through telepathy, or scream "I'm the number one stunna!!" at each other. Nothing of the sort. I have to go over here now.